So let me just say, that I would not be the person who I am today without my big bro Arlen (or as I like to call him, Arloon!)
Yes, we are seven years apart, but that doesn’t stop us from being tighter than Sandy’s leather pants in the last scene of Grease when she goes all bad and smokes a cigarette. Arlen is an amazing brother, who has taught me to always be a good person.
Arlen will always give A Hundo P, and I admire that so much. He will never cut corners, and always does everything how he is supposed to, even if it means taking longer than if he just did a half-assed job.
He is the most morally sound person I have ever met, and is basically so kind that angels look like selfish bastards compared to this guy.
Seriously. Like, get this guy a golden harp, amiright?
It is such a blessing to have such an incredible brother to look up to, and I honestly feel sorry for anyone who isn’t related to him, because they don’t get the opportunity of having such an incredible, creative, warm-hearted, smart man in their lives.
My parents are wonderful, wonderful people, but there is no doubt that Arlen had a huge part in raising me and showing me how to be a good person.
There is no other older brother in the world that never beat up his younger sibs, even when I was being annoying (and trust me, touchy-feely, loud Leah can get preeeetty fuckin annoying.)
There is no other older brother that would make a trophy out of a lemon and paper towel roll for the championship tackle basketball game we played when he babysat for us.
There is no other older brother that would go out of his way to do me any favor I ever asked of him and not expect anything in return and do it with no complaints. The amount of times he has picked me up from somewhere or cleaned the dishes for me is kind of absurd.
No other brother would be down to jam out to our favorite songs with his little sister, or make up alternative songs on the spot with lyrics like, “This darkness, is creeping in my silhouette, and tear drops of blood crawl down from my eyes” in an exaggerated punk accent. (We should literally write this music. Like, every confused teenager wearing black nail polish and gages would buy that shit.)
To my amazing brother, Arly-bone, I cannot begin to express how lucky I am to have such a sweet, caring, honest, and unselfish older broski, and to you I want to wish you a very happy birthday, because you deserve the world and then some.
You inspire me every day to be a better person, and I couldn’t wish you to be any other way.
LOVE YA ARLOON, to Jupiter and back, and may all your B-Day wishes come true! HAPPY 27th!!!