HAPPY FATHER’S DAY: You’re The Best

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(I would like to preface this blog post by warning all fathers reading this to not venture on to read my other blog posts, because they reveal things about your college-age daughters that you would not want to know…trust me…however, all fathers SHOULD read THIS blog post!!)

As the youngest of my father’s daughters, it is true that I am my father’s FAVORITE youngest daughter, and so I find it is only appropriate to write a blog about Father’s Day! YAY!

DEAR DADS,

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY! There are legitimately so many reasons why fathers deserve an entire day devoted to honoring them. Let’s not forget that without these dudes, we wouldn’t exist! And so, they really deserve a whole week! But like, ain’t nobody got time for that.

Dad, Padre, Abba, Haakoro; whatever I call you, I want you to know that you are my superman (and not just because you have a really strong cleft chin). You are completely brilliant, you work tirelessly to provide for your AWESOME fam, you believe in your children, and you carry in your heart an amount of love SO large, I don’t even know what to do with it. Like, I can’t even.

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A squeeze on the shoulder, a kiss on the cheek, a text message of random emojis that show up as a bunch of squares because you don’t have an iPhone…these are all small ways you share your love, and I cherish every moment.

Here are 5 reasons why we LOVE our Dads, and why they deserve to have the most amazing Father’s Day EVER!

1. The Best Shopping Buddies: Dads are the best people to go shopping with, but not clothing shopping…GROCERY shopping! I’m serious. Moms are all about things like health bread and sorbet with flax seeds, but dads want to buy us things that are DELICIOUS, like Coffee Health Bar Crunch ice cream and potato chips.

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They’re also the ones that let us buy soda! So yes, maybe our hearts won’t thank us later when they’re filled with clogs, but for now, they are filled with our fathers’ love!

2. The Best Jokesters: Ahhh Yes, the “Daddy Jokes.” They are the corny jokes our fathers make on a daily basis that you roll your eyes at AND laugh at because even though they are offensively stupid sometimes, we cannot deny that they are also extremely funny!

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Literally, if you told your dad he was a cheesey punster, he may respond with something like, “oh, you mean I’m Munster?” at which you would try not to giggle, and fail miserably. These daddy jokes are witty, clever, and timeless, and so we LOVE our dads for their sense of humor (which we will all regrettably inherit.) #LameParentJokes

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3. The Best Fixer-Upper: As I scanned all the hallmark cards in CVS, I realized that apparently it’s a super typical thing that dads are handy men and fix all the broken things around the house.

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Now, I’m pretty sure the last time my dad touched the toolbox he ended up almost needing stitches, but that’s not to say he doesn’t fix other things. Yes, most fathers fix what is broken in the household, but fathers also fix other, more important broken things. They fix problems. They are the ones to call the school when there is an inaccurate charge on the bill. They are the ones to look all around the house for your lost earring (without telling you they are looking) because they don’t want you to be sad any more. They are the ones that proof read your resume to make sure that everything is perfect. They are handy, and helpful, and a human version of WD-40, which can literally fix anything. You go Dad!

4. The Best Good Cop: Dads are always the good cop in the good cop-bad cop scenario. “Mom, can I have a piece of candy?” “No.” “Dad, can I have a piece of candy?” “Sure honey, grab me one too!” …Literally, Dads are always the good guy. In fights, though they side with mom, or “the boss/Jeffe” as my dad calls her, they still manage to seem like they are on your side. (Side note, this is not to say that the mom is always the bad cop, but like, this IS a Father’s Day post so just let him have this one, ya feel?)

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Maybe it’s their stealthy strategy of staying as quiet as possible, but you just can’t get mad at ‘ol pops. Even when he’s not on your side, he’s still on your side, and that’s why we love em.

5. The Best Role Model: Dads bring home the bacon (or turkey bacon if you’re totally Kosh!) and work all day, giving it their all. They also present themselves well. My dad, though he probably doesn’t know it, is a supah classy guy.

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He knows art, he respects the ballet, he understands which ties are stylish and what cigars to smoke and what wine to drink (after proper aeration of the tannins of course #Wine-ing). He is educated and keeps up with the news by reading the paper instead of just scrolling through twitter. Dads know it all and do it all, and though their stress levels are what let the massage industry thrive, they complain rarely, and still come home with a smile at the end of the day. Like MY dad, fathers are supermen, and they are people to look up to and aspire to be like.

So Daddy, I love you thiiiiiiiiiis much (picture me holding my arms outstretched as far as I can, Michael Jordan Nike Wings poster-style) and I truly hope you understand that not only today do I want you to know that I love you, but that every day I love you more and more, and look up to you (and not just because you’re taller.)

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Though I inherited your never-failing ability to burn yourself on the oven, your restless leg syndrome, and your wide feet, I truly hope I also inherit HALF of the amazing qualities that make you, you, because your heart is warm, your morals are sound, and your love is unmatchable and invaluable.

HAPPY FATHER’S DAY TO YOU AND TO ALL FATHERS!! You deserve it, and much MUCH more!

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P.S., thanks for also giving me my long eye-lashes…those things will get me places 🙂

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