After watching a short clip where Amber Rose spoke about “No” meaning no, I was inspired to reiterate a few things she said as well as add my own insights.
If you haven’t seen the clip, you can press here if you want, OR you can press here (one of them will lead you to the clip, the other will lead you to pictures of macaroni and cheese—both are worth while.)
Amber, a fellow feminist, says that if she is in bed butt naked next to a guy with a condom on who wants to have sex and she says no, it still means no.
Guys may seem confused by this. You may ask; hey bruh, why did she get naked? Why did she get into bed with me? Why is she being a tease?
Maybe she just likes sleeping in her skin outfit, maybe she was just looking for some under bra action, or maybe she just changed her mind.
Regardless of her reasons, if she doesn’t want to sleep with you, you have to respect that. No questions asked. Period. Tampon.
Now another thing I want to discuss is how guys think women are asking to get hit on whence wearing a tight short outfit. In some cases, yes, she might be tits out for da boys.
But in most cases, she is wearing that outfit for herself. She is wearing it because she put it on and felt attractive and empowered and beautiful. That red mini isn’t for the creepy boner guy to her left—it is for herself.
Here’s the thing. I’m sick of women being accused of sexualizing themselves. The only people who are sexualizing women and their bodies are men.
Daily Mail had an article about a woman at the gym who was told her boobs were too tight for her tank top and it was offending the staff and other gym members.
Excuse the steam that just came out of my ears and that weird train noise. #FUMING
First of all, if you have big boobs, every top is going to be tight. Second of all, why is it ok for the slim yoga girls to wear strappy clothes and not someone with big breasts?
I can bet you anything this woman wasn’t wearing the tank top to show off the cleave, and was instead wearing it to stay cool and dry as she worked out.
So why, pray tell, is it, that when a curvy woman wears something revealing, she is trying to gain attention from men, but when a curvy manstress wears something tight and short, no one makes anything of it? (Except maybe get a little grossed out because #ManThighs #ItsARealFear)
For as long as I can remember, my parents taught me that the body is a beautiful thing. No one is grabbing the lotion when they observe Botticelli’s “The Birth of Venus.” Sure, she’s naked, but she is perceived as a spiritual beauty, not an erotic shell stripper.
In truth, the only nude painting we should be sexualizing is Katsushika Hokusai’s “The Dream of the Fisherman’s Wife,” because OMG have you seen that thing?!
But the fact that just recently, Facebook censored a photo of Gustave Courbet’s “L’Origine du Monde” is just such a shame.
We have to stop making the female body into a sex thing and start appreciating women for what they truly are.
Women are smart, resilient, compassionate humans who sometimes want sex, and sometimes don’t. Vagina blood. Pad.
Women are not two boobs and three orifices. Women don’t just give brain, they use their brains too.
So hats off to all the ladies out there who have survived the constant body shaming and cat calling…and no, imaginary uncomfortable gym staffer, I will not put my hat back on.